Friday, September 30, 2005

pardon the French, mesdames et messieurs...

PART DEUX of my Aqua Force diatribe... joined in progress...

However, I had in mind to have a veritable international force of aquatic heroics here - complete with une Femme D'Eau / Mulhere D'Agua from the Mediterranean Sea! The Seas have no visible boundaries, see? ;)
Thus, my "Aqua Force" was destined to be a truly international consortium of ecologically-aware champions of *true* justice - yes!
And, besides, the most famous oceanographer of all was a Frenchman!
Why stick to American interests solely? Not on my watch! Not in luminous land! ;)
Rest assured though that my homage to the most famous oceanographer of all, via a nymph-like curvaceous lady, is not in any way an amalgam of Jacques Cousteau and little-known late seventies/eighties porn starlet *delectable* Désirée Cousteau... no! I do not do things that way - even though I am aware of these rather odd facts... The fact remains that a mermaid is simply a thousand times more interesting than a merman... Ask Man From Atlantis Patrick Duffy - he was happier in Dallas than in Atlantis! And ratings were immensely better in the big "T" too...
Case closed.

Other characters and/or character-concepts that I had planned for my aquatic epic would be too strenuous to mention here - as a tad superfluous too! Suffice it to say though that in MY plans, there were no token odd / not-trustworthy / evidently treacherous members à-la-Devilfish - the only obvious soon-to-be-traitor member in all of the variant Justice Leagues (lest you count Justice League Arkham, which was nothing but criminally insane maniacs led by a psychopath and control freak - Batman! And no; it did not make it any better that the Justice League of Apostles made their lone appearance that I know of in Aquaman's chapter of the ''saga'' - that was nice but not nearly enough, for...) - the only traitor to be found had to be placed in Aquaman's Justice League of Atlantis for some unfathomable reason...?!? Why, DC, why?!? With telepathic powers as he possesses, Aquaman should LOGICALLY be able to ferret out any malicious intent coming from, quite obviously, some kind of mutant sea creature...!
I know - amping up the powers of anyone who is neither Soupesy nor Uber-Bat (though Batman has no powers to speak of) is anathema to most DC editors...
However this is simply being CONSISTENT with the idea that AQUAMAN only has telepathic powers in full throttle as far as sea creatures are concerned...! Can't you do that at least - can't you be CONSISTENT, DC?!?
"To summon and command..." as Ted Knight used to recite in the intro of Aquaman's cartoon in the sixties... He could have added "control and read the minds of... every creature of the deep" while he was at it! Ah, but DC sometimes... DC sometimes makes despondency set in within fandom across the nation - across the world!!! Aye, alas, it is most times... Time and time again... But, as PAD says so very often, I digress...

Sometimes I wonder if Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy (respectively voiced by Ernest Borgnine and Tim Conway) do not get more respect from the producers of Spongebob Squarepants than Aquaman himself manages to get from DC...
Art © DC Comics Inc. ~ Commentary © Luminous Inc. ;)


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~My Mer-name is Glaucus Bioluminescence. Wow ~ even the Mer~folk agree that I am luminous! ~They identify me with a minor sea~deity though: Glaukos has nothing to do with glaucoma, at least ~~~ (thank God! The REAL GOD!) ~~~~ Oh... no; Glaukos gave its color to glaucoma... :( ~~ well, says they! ~~~~~~~~ Aegir, Poseidon, Triton and scores of others are more powerful than him, anyway... so there! Everything will be fine! The Aquaficionadas are on my side! :)
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