Aqua News Network

ANN...? ANN...?!? Where are you, ANN...?!? Oh well - we can round up the headlines -past, present and even future (!) - without you, dear sweet ANN Amor... erstwhile Aqua Belle - ha!  Never there when you are *needed* - eh? Figures. You`re not any more reliable than Aqua The Mermaid... Raina The Halifax Mermaid... or Aqua Bella, the other Mermaid of renown...! You only pretended that you were... Ha! But we can manage without you... Sea and behold...

In aquatic news... er... lately:

Tuna shortage could be coming... sooner than you think. 

(what - no lettuce in that sandwich - really?)

(You disappoint highly, Robin... you punk!) 

Sunscreen; it`s as important as ever... 

Nina knows! 

Listen to the song now: 

Heed its message.

Sardines shortage is expected, too...

Aquaccidents will continue to happen 

...can`t be avoided, sometimes...

but there is worse -far worse - out there.

... (sad) story in progress (prolonged agony type) ...

Reports of a tsunami on Mars are leaking out - 

to be confirmed within a year...

A ``Red Planet Washout`` they call it... wow. 

No wonder life was wiped out there...

Meanwhile, fear our own tsunamis here, on Earth!

Don`t go overboard with that, though; 

relax, don`t dew it...

Learn to take it easy despite *all* the bad news - 

like just about any Aquaficionada will do...

They don`t bother with laundry often  

-they would rather discard and buy new clothes- 

but when they do, they use less water. 

Gotta love that orange!

Just do it - use Tide! 

Do it for them all:

Do it now - for a storm is coming

and it is bad...

Fuk...u... shima.

Fuk...a... shima.

Just call the whole thing OFF.

Please.

Ahh... NOW you show up! say goodbye, ANN! 

 ``Goodbye, ANN...!``