FWG - not SJW

Gals are gushing over Aquamomoa (more than they ever did over Battafflack or SuperCavill, that is for sure! Heterosexual gals, that is...) and geeks are going gaga over Mera (nice) and Atlanna too (nicer) as that film that is fast approaching 1 billion dollars at the box-office... Naysayers and haters all around the globe are confounded and CRUSHED. (Yay!)  Everyone agrees (everyone with a brain, that is) - AQUAMAN is the single GREATEST super hero movie EVER to grace any screen anywhere! (Aren't you happy for our childhood hero, Luminous Luciano!) Me? I am keeping my eyes peeled for every little sighting of that Fiji Water Girl chick - that's what I am doing! #FWG... baby!!!

Provided by Corus Media Holdings, Inc - and msn.com - 

and Global News - and US Weekly 

-...aaaaaggghhh: Fair Use Act already!-

Instagram Photo 

Canadian model at the GGA: Kelleth Cuthbert 

a.k.a. "Fiji Water Girl" 

is under contract with Wilhelmina International 

in Los Angeles. She is also married - to a man. 

Not an AQUAMAN - but he does it for her! 

Probably the single most tragic aspect of it all, here! 

For only a woman really understands another woman...

(such is my stance and deepest conviction, you know it!) 

But that's for another time... here... have some AQUAMAN: 

Mysteriously enough, though... 

ATLANNA'S THEME 

(Queen Atlanna's Suite - pardon!) 

is missing from there...?!? 

What gives... WaterTower Music?!? 

IT IS ALL ABOUT ATLANNA 

(AND MERA) 

for *many* of us here... y'know!!! 

Let's remedy to that right now: 

For all her magnificence, however - QUEEN ATLANNA 

has the most peculiar tastes: goldfish for breakfast... 

The creepy, ooky Trench for hideout... 

And men - to cavort with offshore...! 

Back to the  FIJI WATER GIRLS  we go then! 

(because, that's right: there are waaay more than just one!) 

That Kelleth Cuthbert cutie still appears to be the most 

Aquaficionada-like of them all... somehow: 

Corus Media Holdings, Inc ...

Fair Use Act!!! 

And others have noticed that, too...

AQUAGIRL 

has been found 

ALREADY! 

There she is - there, there and even there...! 

She's everywhere - the Fiji Water Girl... Aquagirl! 

(She is making a serious case here not only for Meme of the Year 

and Viral Photo of the Decade - but also to stop Mera's 

winning streak here, on aqua musings, for the title of 

Aquaficionada of the Year...!!!) 

But, as always, there are doubters out there... 

What abysmal, unimaginative morons there are, out there...! 

Just like the dumb-a$$es you exposed on your last time here, 

Luminous Luciano...! 

(For once, we are in agreement - see?) 

(Let's not make it a habit - like Aquaman said!) 

*FWG* outshone everybody on that red carpet! 

From drop-dead gorgeous aquamarine eyeshade above 

to drop-dead gorgeous beautiful butch in a suit, below... 

On to the brightest and the best: redheaded queen 

(and once your top choice to play Mera - admit it!) 

Julianne Moore - to the reigning queen of time travel 

(alas, it is neither Sara nor Ava... sigh!) 

Caitriona Balfe of Outlander fame... 

all the way down to Cuoco! 

Really not that hard to upstage the dumb blonde 

originally from Nebraska, relocated to Pasadena 

and all washed up now that the Big Bang implodes...! 

''FWG'' is inspiring COPYCATS too: 

You better tell them at DC to hurry up, though, Luminous Luciano: 

if they truly want her to compete with Amber and Aquamomoa 

for most impassioned acting ever seen on a blockbuster film - 

the competition already has its sights set on her, also...

(Those bloody Marvel Zombies - grrrrr!) 

*FWG* AQUAGIRL 

IS A SUPERSTAR! 

... BUT SHE REALLY SHOULD HAVE TOLD US ALL 

ABOUT THIS NOW: 

I MEAN... 

 WOW! 

Fine reading material, that water bottle label - very revealing! 

Even more interesting: the reading materials that 

the FWG appears to affectionate a lot, too - 

surely she reads it just for the articles, also...

right, Luminous Luciano? 

We only wish that our lovely Fiji Water Girl/Aquagirl here 

would be the one on the left, on this pic, below, 

sealing the deal with a real blonde, for a change: 

.A.A.

xxx

Aqua Commerce

Spring Break and Summer Heat right around the corner - or so we dream... If it neither comes fast enough, we can always come to them - traveling south! Either way, year round, there are so many fine aquatic-themed products out there - you didn`t think we were done blogging about them already, did you? No, of course not... Here are so more gems then - so you may shop until you drop into a mercantile ocean trying to find them all now - sea if we care...

But, first (before the devouring commences!) 

let us have a quick recap 

of the rules of mercantilism now...

Oh... M.A.M.A. 

Shades of AQ`s old O.G.R.E. problems there! 

And then some...! 

But enough delays already - 

let`s go shop!

Those AQUA products appear to be GOOD...

If one can believe the smiles on all of these Aquaficionadas` faces!

The Best (coziest too) and safest way to be an Aquaman:

Ah, at last - a luminous aqua product:

Nice merchandising there, I guess... 

But have a closer look before you BUY:

Something`s OFF with those dimensions...

Blame it on water distortion!

Disproportionate arms there too - no?

Too much Hydro Disc Jamming, I guess...

Sevylor Aqua Lounger - the spokesperson/model seems happy with it!

Mera material? Maybe...

Aquaficionada - for sure! 

Next!

``Come on, come on, come on baby now...

Just... SPLASH AND PLAY!``

Kid`s not smiling though - like, at all!

Reminds me of one of my earliest swimming lessons...

But let`s not get into that - NEXT!

Now ``AQUA... BONES`` is a very... ah... original concept/design product, I would say...

Now that`s a Sea Horse for the rednecks, methinks...! 

Nice to know that it ``stays`` too...

This would be the Aquaficionada Pair... By The Sea clothing line?

Maybe not...

Next: it reminds us of that SNL skit with Phil as Charlton;

``SOYLENT WHITE IS PEOPLE``

(~~unless it`s fish?~~)

And here is the gift that keeps on giving:

Parched after all the hard work?

Have some H2O - after having mopped the floor with it!

Now... what is THIS?!? 

My old team concept come to life - AQUA FORCE?

Aw... no, of course not...

Just Abercrombie & Fitch`s LOGO. DUH.

So many SALES... so little time.

We would be remiss if we didn`t mention three things 

about this *SAIL* here... 

There is a huge SALE going on right now there - indeed. 

(This Baron dude may or may not be part of it...)

The (first) word is a pretty good SONG too - here it is: 

The Awolnation dude is almost - no, actually, he definitely is - 

more Aquamannish than... y`know-who!

We prefer this version -

we call it the Aquaficionada Remix!

And we would truly be remiss if we did not underline 

the dichotomy... underwater or above waters...

And now... this.

Call it... a public safety message.

And swim away!